This Is Why Miley Cyrus’ VMA Performance Was A Failure

Miley Cyrus. The VMAs. Brooklyn. 2013. This is the year Miley is showing the world that she’s a ~grown woman~. Sound familiar?

miley cyrus britney

Of course it does. Clearly, Miley’s inspiration for the night was none other than the queen of the VMAs herself, pop music extraordinaire and everyday legend: Miss Britney Spears.

miley cyrus britney

WHAT MILEY CYRUS WAS TRYING TO DO: Appear mysteriously. Britney achieved this with dramatic music and a giant spider-looking thing that turned around to reveal her literal “not so innocent” self.

miley cyrus britney

WHAT MILEY CYRUS ACTUALLY DID: Miley came out of a monkey’s chest.

miley cyrus britney

WHAT MILEY CYRUS WAS TRYING TO DO: She was trying to have her “I’m a grown woman!” moment. Britney achieved this with a sexy and sparkly striptease. She also wore a fedora and one of those cordless pop music microphones.

miley cyrus britney

OMG! So cutting edge.

miley cyrus britney

THAT THONG. So unexpected.

miley cyrus britney

WHAT MILEY CYRUS ACTUALLY DID: She danced around with a bunch of oversized stuffed animals and unenthused pink bears.

miley cyrus britney

She fist-pumped and screamed

miley cyrus britney

And had a stuffed animal rub her back.

miley cyrus britney

Then her clothes came off and she took out a large finger with a big red nail.

miley cyrus britney

WHAT MILEY CYRUS WAS TRYING TO DO: Get into the zone and really have a moment with herself. Britney achieved this by dancing her ass off. She also had crimped hair.

miley cyrus britney

WHAT MILEY CYRUS WAS TRYING TO DO: Make sexy, sophisticated, yet raunchy faces.

miley cyrus britney

Britney achieved this because she’s a flawless and iconic human being.

miley cyrus britney

WHAT MILEY CYRUS ACTUALLY DID: Point a large fake finger at Robin Thicke.

miley cyrus britney

WHAT MILEY CYRUS WAS TRYING TO DO: Steal the show.

miley cyrus britney

WHAT MILEY CYRUS ACTUALLY DID: Make pink bears sad.

miley cyrus britney

Basically, I think you get the point. This is how you do a coming-of-age performance:

miley cyrus britney

And this is how you don’t:

miley cyrus britney

Source